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Kane & Lynch: Dead Men

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Downing a handful of pills, Suzy Wallace prepares for the busy day of crime ahead

I for one, am bored of goody-goody heroes. Save the world from alien invasion here, overthrow an evil dictator there and rescue the attractive women while you're at it. No doubt they go home and spend their free time rescuing kittens that have got stuck up trees before organising their local neighbourhood watch as well. Give me a gun-toting anti-hero any day.... read more

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Kane & Lynch: Dead Men

Postby GrimSqueaker » 24 Nov 2007, 00:25

Another one for the downers:

It seems to be having the same "crash after a minute" problem as Gears of War - if you had that problem with Gears, stay clear of this like it's a spew covered leper, despite it's supposed awesomeness, as you'll be flushing 30 quid down the crapper. Unless you fancy upgrading to Vista and kissing goodbye to a) A stable OS, b) the 200 odd quid Vista costs and c) 800megs of your RAM.

I repeat - if gears of war crashes for you after 1 minute, so will this. But this has no "windowed mode" fix.
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Are you talking about the same game?

Postby elevatordog » 06 Dec 2007, 11:21

I bought a copy of this and Ive never - not ever been so insulted with how a product has disappointed, no disgusted me in the shear depths of boredom and mediocrity. The graphics are of PS2 standard - the level architecture is paramount to retard spaghetti. (Ive just made that up I know but it just seems so apt).

I can only assume the publishers of this game hate gamers?

Why do you hate me?
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Postby humorguy » 06 Dec 2007, 12:23

This game has so far caused the firing of a Gamespot editor (6.0 review score) and has managed to raise anothe PC Zone 6.5 review when you read the words and yet a 7.9 review score! PC Zone occasionally has this disjoint between the words stated and the score given.

After all, how can a SEVEN HOUR game with the problems this game has get a 7.9 anyway?!

Sorry, but if a PC game is just seven hours long, it needs to be bloody brilliant to get more than a 7.0! HL2 EP1 was only worth a 7.5 for being being brilliant but only 5 hours long. COD4 deserved a 6.2 score for pretending this game has a single player campaign when it only had around 5 hours of single play gaming.

If the game media truly support PC gamers rather than the industry they were in, games with less than 10 hours of single play plus multiplayer would be reviewed as a multiplayer game with a single player element, not the other way around, and the media should have specific multiplayer review sections to place these types of games in. Too many games over the last couple of years have pretended to be single player when really they were just multiplayer with a small single player element. (And sometimes a poor single player element at that!) PC Zone and others should not support this like they currently do.
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Postby Sir_Loin_Ofsteak » 22 Jan 2008, 05:35

I have to say that reading your review I actually wondered if I was playing the same game. Bought it today, and it wouldn't run (kept crashing after 1 min). Then I updated the Games for Windows, and it does now run, though the sound is f**ked.

Cinematic? Maybe if it were 5 years old. It has a couple of nice graphical touches, to be sure, but it suffers from boring world detail. Also, how can you recommend a game that's all about shooting when you say the combat sections are lacking (which I agree with you, oh so much)? Max Payne was cinematic, there was a game that got combat right.

I only paid £20 for it thankfully, as if I had paid more I would have felt completely robbed. Suzy, I'm disappointed that you can't see past the graphics to the mediocrity of this game. It further reinforces my belief that we are experiencing a serious lack of gameplay in the titles of today. When did people forget that they're supposed to be fun?
I remember when all these fields were blue.
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looked fine to me

Postby User removed » 18 Feb 2008, 11:00

Haven't played through the whole game yet, but the game's fun enough for me. Not to be compared with bioshock or whatever. But if you've ever played hitman, it looks like the same graphics engine, a little dated but fun enough to play. Seven hours seem to me an awful lot, because i've been playing for 3 hours and already i'm in cuba. So it cant last any longer, about the multiplayer... . Who buyes a game like this for mp?!?

Score should be somewhat like a 6, not any higher. Story, humor and action makes up for the lousy graphics and gameplay. And if you just have to play it for 5 hours, whats the problem.
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continued

Postby User removed » 22 Feb 2008, 17:27

Man this game is a missed opportunity, finished it by now. But must say they really messed it up, especially the last levels. Sound not working, glitching in graphics. Crappy storyline, and so on and so on. Read about a gamespot employee got fired after placing a bad review of this game. Must agree with him, this must not rate higher than below average. The 7.9 this server is giving it, is far too high.
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Postby Sir_Loin_Ofsteak » 31 Mar 2008, 11:54

Agreed. I finally got around to completing it last night. I would say that the ending was anti-climactic but that would imply that the game was reaching some level of climax, which would be misleading.

I'd give it 60% if I were feeling generous, but really it's more of a 54. Flush this turd!
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